It's not easy to learn how to save a marriage these days. There are so many factors that are working against two people being in a long-term relationship, from communication breakdown to a lack of trust to outside influences such as unemployment or illness. However, there is good news for those that want to learn how to save a marriage, as many counselors are now specializing in just that and are finding that there are some changes that most couples can make that greatly improve communication and the marriage bond. If both spouses are willing to work and make some changes, then they have a good chance at being able to learn how to save a marriage.
The first step in learning how to save a marriage usually involves identifying the problems that are plaguing that marriage specifically. What is wrong with one marriage may not be a problem with someone else's. With any marriage it might be a lack of communication, some lack of consideration on the part of one spouse or the other, or something else. Usually a counselor especially will get to know a couple before trying to teach them how to save a marriage so that they can identify the actual problems that are tearing at a couple. Learning how to save a marriage is like trying to diagnose a medical condition; you need to figure out the exact reason for your pain before you can actually prescribe any medication.
Typical changes that need to be made when learning how to save a marriage involve considering the other spouse's feelings when making decisions or when acting. Too often a spouse acts however they want to or how they did when they were single without considering their spouse's feelings, preferences, or opinions. Learning how to save a marriage means being reminded that there are two in the relationship and neither one's preferences or opinions should always take precedence over the other. It may be painful, but sometimes one or more likely both spouses need to have it pointed out to them how their own particular selfish behavior is causing stress on the marriage. It can also be pointed out some new ways of thinking or behaving.
Many people try to learn how to save a marriage on their own and of course this is commendable. There's nothing wrong with trying to be reflective or honest and in really taking a long hard look at oneself and one's habits and personality. You may want to consider some professional help when you've exhausted all your possibilities or are really at a loss as to the next step in learning how to save a marriage. Sometimes a neutral third party can give you an objective opinion or point out things that may not have ever occurred to you. Many people are hesitant to see a counsel or talk to someone else about what they see as being private issues, but remember that nothing you do when learning how to save a marriage is a waste; it's all worth it.